My Dear ----------
Today I am torn between your need of wanting me to be there with you, and my pain of realising my demeanor has left you wanting more. As the case seems I have never left your side, I have always, will always be there for you. it's not that I have an option not to, but I chose not to have an option. My Love for you was a reason, my respect for you was the reason's reason.
You have held yourself high in all trying and testing times, weakened only when you feared loosing me, this strength is what I derived my strength from. How can I leave your side, when it's the side I draw sight from, I draw sense from. How could I not be on your side when trials and tribulations hit you on your face, when I am the one to be protecting your beutiful face from scars and pains. How could I not be on your side, when you would have not been in the mess that you are, had I not been on your side?
The love as we so call it, doesn't have a definition, I don't know why I love you, I don't know what is Love, if I were to be asked whether I loved you, I'd say yes, but would I mean it, I don't know. All I know is that I want to spend all my waking moments with you, I want to be the pain in your life, I want to be the balm to it too. I want you to be the guiding light in my life, even if you loose the way and not ask for directions. I want you to be the touch I feel, even though I brand you as insensitive. I want you to be my fashion critic, even though I think your dressing sense would scare off Govinda. I want you to be my smile, even though the tears are given by you.
The first thought that strikes me when I do something, is not whether God would approve, or my family would pat me on my ack, but whether you'd nod your head in approval and support. The first thought that strikes me when I am mean, or I bitch is whether you'd say that you are disappointed.
I am by your side because I need you, like I need my independence, like I need to communicate, like I need to read, like I need to express, like I want to live.
So don't ever ask me to be there, I am already there...
again the cliché :)